My Slacking Colleague Stole My Thunder – Where’s Her Shame?

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I've never encountered someone as lazy, avoidant of work, and full of excuses as this particular female colleague whom I unfortunately interact with every day. Despite her charm and talkativeness, she excels at maintaining relationships With senior personnel, she gets along well, but when it boils down to actually doing the work, she avoids it like a allergy.

In our team’s Slack channel, she often steps forward to volunteer for various tasks or projects. However, she subsequently messages me privately asking me to handle them instead. Later on, she claims full credit without any hesitation—taking recognition for ideas I've come up with, revising proposals I wrote, tweaking paragraphs, and asserting that we collaborated on these efforts. I have witnessed her add her name to work I finished beforehand; when confronted about altering credits, she would claim confusion. While I am enthusiastic about learning new skills and contributing more during this stage of my career, dealing with such behavior from her is incredibly frustrating. Any advice on how to address this situation?

Shoshanna Davis founded Fairy Job Mother, A thriving group with over 30,000 members assisting young individuals in developing self-assurance and fulfilling careers. Although she did not pass her A-level exams and entered university via clearing, she forged a prosperous path at Intel, advancing to become the company’s leader in industrial affairs and employee advocacy. Her journey began Fairy Job Mother In 2020, during the COVID-19 lockdown, she became frustrated with the inadequate and impractical career counseling provided for young individuals. She often shares candid advice on this topic. Instagram and LinkedIn .

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I have heard from people who have experienced similar situations, and what I have urged them and you to do is stop letting this happen. Regardless of whatever’s going on with your colleague and how she conducts herself at work, she’s treating you like a doormat because you’re allowing it.

We can't dictate how others act, but we can manage our reactions. It's important for you to discover or build the confidence To begin building your presence, since without doing so, this situation might recur either with a different coworker or at another organization. Others will likely view you as an effortless mark who agrees readily and becomes easily exploited. I believe it would be beneficial for you to engage in some personal introspection.

Plant your feet firmly and assert yourself.

It’s time to start pushing back and responding strategically when these situations arise. So when your colleague asks you privately to do something she volunteered for, put it back on her. You can say something like, “sure, but just to confirm, you’re going to be listing me as a lead on this when we share it with the team, correct?” Or “you’re happy for me to be the one that shares this with the team, right?” Equally, you could say, “I’m happy to support, but since you volunteered, I’ll let you take the lead. Let me know what you need from me.” Another option would be to respond with the fact that you’ll let your manager know that you’ll also be working on this, just so they’re aware of your workload .

If you provide some resistance they didn’t anticipate, they could begin altering their approach towards you. By shifting the responsibility onto your coworker, you might compel them to act collaboratively and supportively instead. Additionally, this can help create documented proof should you require it later.

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Boost your visibility

I'd also take preemptive action against potential credit theft by getting ahead of it. For any projects you've spearheaded or made significant contributions to, make sure to share those accomplishments across all relevant platforms as needed.

When you step up like this, you become more noticeable, particularly within the higher ranks which your coworker seems adept at cultivating strong ties with. Even if you produce top-notch work globally, without recognition from others, all efforts might go unnoticed. Being seen matters greatly; it appears as though your peer excels significantly in navigating these dynamics.

We must take ownership of our career paths. Indeed, certain individuals are inherently more extroverted and may excel at advocating for their professional accomplishments. For those who are introverted These tasks can be quite challenging. Therefore, I suggest taking small steps. Perhaps start with sharing weekly updates about what you've been working on with the rest of your team, presenting it as part of a project status report. This way, it won't come across as boastful.

Simultaneously, I suggest collecting evidence as well. Begin monitoring and maintaining a personal log of any duties or initiatives you've spearheaded, significant suggestions you've presented, or contributions you've made—especially instances where you believe your coworker has obstructed you, even those from before.

This step helps ensure you maintain a record of the data should you need to escalate the issue later on for reference. If your newfound confidence doesn’t halt further Slack requests, my suggestion is to discuss the matter directly with your coworker.

Share what’s on your mind – with respect

We should approach this thoughtfully, focusing on the impact rather than personal traits or feeling betrayed. Maybe start by venting to a friend or relative to release those negative emotions, ensuring that when you talk to your coworker, the discussion remains as professional and diplomatic as possible.

You might express it this way: "It seems I've taken charge of multiple important responsibilities without receiving recognition. It would be great if we could clarify who owns what moving forward, particularly since I'm working diligently to enhance both my growth and profile within the organization."

It's then time to hear their input and strive to truly understand where they're coming from, as many perspectives can add significant value. conflict at work In my experience, it all boils down to misunderstandings, incorrect assumptions, and poor communication.

Your colleague might not be aware of this behavior or realize how much you care about it, simply because you haven't really expressed where you stand, set your limits, or shared what you desire. This presents an opportunity for you to clarify these points.

Should everything fall through, take it up with your supervisor.

Should there be no change after taking initial steps, then bring the matter to your supervisor. The approach should be straightforward: present the details and seek their viewpoint. You might phrase it thusly, "Here’s how things stand; I've also begun documenting these occurrences. Could you share your thoughts?" By doing so, you'll prompt your manager to notice and consider the issue. Initiating the discussion through questioning enables your manager to steer the talk and propose solutions themselves instead of appearing as though you're reporting someone behind closed doors.

Certainly, manager involvement might create some discomfort, yet try not to let unease that isn't of your making affect you or hold you back. You’ve attempted to address a circumstance that has persisted for quite some time and provided them ample opportunity to alter their conduct. Therefore, from your perspective, there shouldn’t be any reason for discomfort on your side. Just continue doing your work.

No matter what happens, address the issue head-on immediately. Take action now before things escalate further. Given your evident talent and drive, speak up confidently regarding your accomplishments. In public settings, request challenging assignments or extra responsibilities directly. Ensure those key people hear about your efforts straight from you rather than secondhand. It’s crucial to begin showcasing yourself; once you do, nothing will hold you back.